Music Monday Mash-up

It’s a few minutes after midnight so technically, it’s Music Monday. Today I have decided to post 2 songs that I think sound very much alike. In fact, when I heard video #1 (released in 2014) on the radio for the first time, I instinctively started singing the chorus to video #2 (released in 2005).

Here is the newer song that caught my attention on the radio. It is called “Me and my broken heart” by Rixton.

If the chorus to that song doesn’t already sound familiar to you I can only assume you have never been much of a Rob Thomas (or Matchbox 20) fan. That’s ok, I don’t judge. Lol. Here is the song I started singing when it got to the chorus…

The second video is Rob Thomas (lead singer of the group Matchbox 20) singing his solo hit “Lonely No More”.

The verses have many differences that can be ignored but the chorus is too similar for me to go un-noticed. If you play the videos at the same time during the chorus it’s very obvious. The notes are similar as is the arrangement of the entire chorus. There are a few runs in each that are not identical. The first video by Rixton starts out with their chorus and in the second video with Rob Thomas his first chorus starts at approximately 0:42 seconds. Go ahead give it a try. Even if the two videos aren’t completely in sync, you can hear the similarities.

I am not attempting to bash or accuse the band Rixton. I have no evidence they had ever heard Rob Thomas’ song before. I just find these kinds of things very interesting. For me it is a major music inspiration. Like the video I posted week before last. Two songs that can be glued together into one magical piece of music. To be able to recognize the similarities and the differences, and hopefully, one day, be able to just sit down at my piano and play them. I joke around with PC often about the “Man Cave” he thinks he will have in our future home. I tell him he is crazy if he thinks I’m not using that space for a music studio. Well, I don’t know if I can stick to my guns on that one but I WILL have a music space. A spare bedroom, a shed in the back, hell, who needs a dining room table? It’s just the 2 of us… Hehe! Eventually I would love to have the equipment I need to put together my own medley’s and mash-ups. How fun would that be? I could play around with sounds, tones, rhythms, and bits and pieces of thousands of songs. With the proper equipment I could have put these 2 songs together in one video for you, making it easier to hear the similarities. Ok, I’m starting to ramble on here. If you know of a couple of songs that sound similar, leave me a comment and I will check it out. Music suggestions are always welcome!

Stay tuned for next week’s Music Monday Mash-up! I’m on a roll now…

Much Love To All!


Music Monday

Joan Osborne – Spider Web

This week’s video is a throw back for me. I remember listening to this cd over and over again. During this time period I was more interested in alternative music and heavy metal. Joan Osborne is most known for her song “One of us”.

The meaning of this song always struck me. I’m not even sure I had a theory back in the day about the meaning. It was interesting anyhow. I guess there are a couple of ways to interpret these lyrics.

“When you’re feelin’ lonely, when you’re hidin’ in your bed, Don’t forget your string of pearls. Don’t forget your spider webs.”

Maybe Joan is insinuating a spider web is anything that might be holding us back from our true potential. Or perhaps the spider web is the result of not reaching our potential. I would like to thing that Ray Charles would still have become the artist he did, with or without is sight. But honestly, did his lack of sight create the internal determination he needed to become an artist? I guess we will never know. I am glad he pursued music, either way.

I am up late (early I guess?) because I have to snack now before 7am. After that I must fast for my tests later today. First is the ultrasound of the abdomen and after that I have something called a HIDA test. All I know about that one is that it involves an IV for the contrast and can take around an hour and a half to complete. These are not IF tests. They are for my tummy troubles. Ps..if you know what the HIDA is, please keep it to yourself until after I go through it. The less I know before hand the less chance I will freak out and not show up. I can’t let that happen. I need answers!!! I will get the results sometime later this week, hopefully. I’m anticipating gallstones and possibly surgery to get that gallbladder out. I will try to post an update when I know more.

Much Love To All!

Music Monday!

I have always loved this song! The original version is Pachelbel’s Canon in D Major. I walked down the aisle to it when PC and I got married in 2003!

This is my favorite Christmas song ever!

PC and I bought the tickets to TSO back in September. Pre-sale in fact. We were so excited!

Fast forward to this weekend. I woke up Saturday (concert day) feeling horrible. My tummy was upset and I was fighting a panic attack with all my might. Plus, PC and I were arguing. Then my dad called to tell me my grandma passed away, my step mom’s mom. Well shit…

I had no idea what to do.

I wasn’t very surprised that something came up though. This is the story of my life. No good stuff without bad stuff at the same damn time, creating all sorts of struggle, anxiety and moral decisions to be made. It felt like a challenge. The universe was giving me every reason NOT to go to this concert. Where the hell was the universe when we bought the tickets??? No where! But the day of the concert…..BAM! Ugh.

I am not extremely close with my step mom’s family. Most of them don’t like me much. I’m too honest for their liking. Being around most of them would not have helped me grieve and I wouldn’t have brought much comfort to them either.

So we went to the concert as planned.

The show must go on.

It was incredible! I was miserable through most of it, unfortunately. My panic wasn’t going away and I made sure I knew where the nearest restroom was. I wanted to leave several times but I wanted to hear Carol of the bells even more. You know they save that one for last, of course. In the end I am so glad we went. Screw you panic! You were not going to stop me from FINALLY seeing this concert! I heard my 2 favorite songs live! I could feel the beat in my bones. It was beautiful. I cried several times. I think we found our new holiday tradition!!

Dear Gamma B: “HOW ‘BOUT THEM COWBOYS??” You were always their number one fan and today you had the best seats in the house. Mele Kalikimaka!! We love you and will miss you greatly!

Much Love To All!

Why does it bother me?

Five months ago-ish PC and I shared with our family that we are buying a house. This is a huge step for us. Just as TTC was. Well this plan is going to turn out better than that one did and we are excited! We need this positive move in our lives. A step forward for a change since our IF journey started.

Our families know where we are in our process and they know the frustration we feel so far. We found many houses we just loved while we were getting approved and saving the down payment. Now we have everything we need but don’t love any of the available houses. So how does our family react? Just as I expected………

PC’s sister and her hubby just bought a house!




She told me about a month ago that our (me and PC) talking about buying a home lit a fire under her hubby’s butt. They decided to figure out what they had to do to sell the one they were in and buy a new one.  And now BAM! They have a house! A beautiful 2 story home right around the corner from where they already live. They swore they would never get a 2 story due to the extra utility bills, maintenance and more. Plus, now they live in the same neighborhood as my ex- bestie. This ought to be fun!  I had no idea they were this serious and this close. They went from NO house payment to a mortgage. Not that that is a problem for them because they owned their house so they had a pretty nice down payment resulting in a fairly low mortgage payment I’m sure. Meanwhile PC and I chose to cash in a couple of stocks to get our down payment quicker, so we didn’t miss out on another fantastic house! UGH!

Why does this piss me off??? It makes my skin crawl! This is exactly how I felt after my IF diagnosis! Everyone knew we were TTC, then they knew I was diagnosed and conceiving would be difficult…then BAM!! Everyone and their dog suddenly got pregnant! No exaggeration…my friend’s dog got pregnant! One by one, all (okay I’m sure not all) the women (girls!) around me started getting pregnant! One of them has already had TWO children since my diagnosis.

I guess seeing his sister and bro-in-law buy a house just brings back all of the horrible feelings that I felt while everyone was getting pregnant around me. I felt like a failure. A huge failure! And was expected to be happy for them all. Pretending like it wasn’t killing me inside. Wishing it was US they were excited for! I know this stupid house thing is not the same as our IF journey but it feels horrible too. It’s like they stole our thunder, so to speak. We are so excited about this step in our lives. We are so proud of what we have sacrificed to get to this point.  It is taking us time to do it right and pick the perfect home and in a month his sister does it with no problem at all. No sacrifice, no struggling, no frustration…. I guess everything PC and I do in life is doomed to be a huge ball of stress and struggle while every other human in the world can do the same, easy peasy. Do they have to do it while we are struggling to do it too?????? Seriously?!? None of these people (the pregnancies, house buying) could have waited a bit?? I’m tired of feeling like my loved ones enjoy beating me to the punch!

I am well aware of how petty this all sounds. I can’t pretend this doesn’t bother me though. I am sure our family members aren’t doing these things to hurt us but it sure is starting to feel like that is the case, more and more with each incident.

Well, I am not going to focus on these feelings tonight. I have some cleaning to do before I turn in for the night. I think I will turn on some Trans-Siberian Orchestra in preparation for this weekend’s concert! That is what I will focus on for now.

Much Love To All!

Music Monday

This is another artist I found during my many hours of you tube entertainment. He started out by doing a number of grand covers and now he has his own album of original songs. His youtube name is only1noah.  If you enjoy hearing covers I encourage you to look him up.

I find comfort in his tone. Just raspy enough to make a significant impact on the emotion of each song.

For the rest of the month I plan on picking Christmas music on Music Monday’s but eventually, I am confident you will see this guy on my blog again! He makes me want to get back into singing again. Maybe in our new house PC will let me “build” a studio.

I hope you enjoy today’s Music Monday pick. I also hope you all have a fantabulous week!

Much Love To All!

Music Monday, a little early…

I have decided to start a scheduled post. Every Monday I will post a music video or maybe just some inspiring lyrics for what I will call “Music Monday”. This weekend will be a busy one for me due to my niece’s first birthday (my god-daughter) and visiting daddy in the hospital while he recovers from his stroke. I actually had a good day today. I got plenty of rest last night and despite a minor tummy ache, no vomiting or serious panic. So here is my first Music Monday video a little early.

This group has been one of my favorites for a long time now. The do all a capella songs and are very, very talented! You can find them on youtube under the name PTXofficial. They are called Pentatonix.

I hope I will be able to maintain my planned schedule in the future. Music is my muse. I have used music for healing my soul since I was a small child. I am told I could sing an entire song off the radio long before I could (or would) form a full sentence. My taste in music varies GREATLY! If I ever offend anyone with a song or lyrics I apologize in advance. You can’t always make a judgement based on the lyrics however, because I often fall in love with the background music, the piano or even just the beat. Sometimes, I can just feel the emotions the artist was feeling while singing.

So cheers to having a good day and a great weekend!

Much Love To All!

Steady My Heart

My cousin posted this video this morning. It struck me. I listened to it at least 3 times in a row. I felt like they were singing to me. I thought it was beautiful. Then I realized why I needed to hear that.

About an hour later, I learned my great niece was born this morning. I hadn’t heard the news yet because I unfriended my nephew and his gf months ago from facebook. His gf was a horrible source of daily reminders. Matter of fact she never just posted once a day, so it was more than just daily reminders from her. For those of you who are not familiar with that story here is the very short version: My nephew (now 21yrs old) and his girlfriend (not even 21 yrs old) already have a son. They announced their pregnancy in the middle of my IF journey and they fit the “Why do THEY deserve a child” category perfectly. Then they announced their second pregnancy before their son was a year old, at our family Easter party, which I later found out I was the only one who didn’t know about the pregnancy before the party. That was awkward to say the least.

Anyhow, the baby is precious. I feel different about this one. Maybe it was the absence of all those reminders I no longer get thanks to unfriending. I’m not sure. Hopefully it means I am coping better these days. That would be great news.

Then I think, maybe God is helping to steady my heart. But I don’t even want to think that way because there are so many questions that would follow that thought, for me anyways. Like, why would he take the time to steady my heart? Why wouldn’t he help me with my health instead and not have to steady my heart? Why doesn’t he give the couples that don’t even want children an IF journey? Why give anyone those struggles??? Well I am still working through those questions in my heart but for now I will choose to be grateful. Grateful for the peaceful feeling after this birth. Grateful for my blessing that don’t even involve IF. If I stop complaining about my health long enough, I have PLENTY of blessings to be thankful for. I really am blessed in so many ways.

So on a different note, I plan on organizing my blog. Usually I just start writing when my heart has something to say or I read something that I feel I need to share. I haven’t been able to notice if any of you blog on a schedule but I am considering it. If you use some sort of schedule, how has it helped you? I plan on making an effort to post as many positive blogs as I do negative. This is my only place to vent but if I don’t already have a positive post in mind to balance out my negative vent, I will refrain from blogging at all. You bring about what you think about! Maybe that plan will help to KEEP my heart steady!

Much Love To All!