Are you in control of your own “account”?

I recently noticed how much I have allowed my jewelry business to fall onto the back burner. I got so wrapped up in my health and emotions I forgot how rewarding it was to be creative. So tonight I set out to start AND FINISH a necklace. And this is the result.

ribbon1I had to take a beginner’s course in sewing to be sure I was doing it right. I used sheer pink ribbon and sewed chocolate beads onto it. Technically I am not finished, I still need to complete the clasp. That will require a little shopping though. I don’t have the pieces I need for this particular clasp.

My hope for this year is to get motivated about this business again. When I first got started I was all business. I was networking, shopping, organizing and researching everything I could about owning a small business. That lasted about 3 or 4 months. Then I kind of forgot about the work that needed to go into it. This year I vow to stay on track no matter what my body decides to spring on me next. Not only do I want to be a business owner, I need to remember how therapeutic this process is for me. It’s a great way to make deposits into my “bank account”. If you missed my post about that, you can find it here.

I think I realized yesterday how low my funds are. It’s not something I think about often but yesterday I stopped by the gas station to pick up a few things my dad and step mom asked for. While there, the clerk asked to see my ID. After the shock wore off, I handed my him my license. After he inspected it and realized I’m in my late 30’s, he apologized and said “Wow. you look really, really good”. This is a man I have seen on a weekly basis for a couple of years now. He knows me and PC, yet he acted like he didn’t even recognize me. I thanked him for his kindness and jokingly told him he could ask for my ID anytime. As I drove to the hospital to see my dad I found myself smiling. I was flattered. What woman wouldn’t be, right? It gets better. While sitting with my dad and step mom downstairs in the common area, two other patients joined us. Both were veterans, one was a sergeant. My dad has gotten the chance to know these gentlemen in the past month or so. He introduced me as his oldest daughter. Immediately the sergeant asks my age. When I told him I am 36 he says “What? Really? You look 25 at the most!” He then went on to ask how I could be so pretty coming from my dad. Everyone laughed at his sarcasm. It was a lengthy conversation considering it was mostly about my age and looks.

I was as baffled as I was flattered though. Yesterday, I was tired, not feeling well and thanks to my tummy problems I was dealing with severe hunger pains. It was not one of my good days. I just brushed my teeth, threw on my over-sized hockey jersey (that I usually only wear to bed) and skipped the make-up routine all together. My hair was wavy (I thought it looked kind of sloppy) from sleeping in braids the night before, and I grabbed my tennis’ and walked out the door. I wasn’t dressed like a bum but I certainly didn’t put half the effort into my appearance as I usually do.

My thought is, if my “bank account” had more funds available yesterday’s events wouldn’t have been such a big deal to me. That’s probably why I had such an urge to make another necklace. It’s like my subconscious remembered how rewarding it is for me. You would think I would be creative much more often since I know how I enjoy it and how it makes me feel. An extension of this thought is, maybe I have been relying too much on others to make deposits. Why can’t I be responsible for my funds? I can add to my account as often as I want! I am the one who knows when it is low, right? Well that is my other vow for the year. Take responsibility for my own “bank account”!!

Much Love To All!

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