I am proud of my tree this year. My nephew named him Olaf. Hopefully this will be our last Christmas in this apartment. I am determined to have the holidays at our new house next year. We have passed on a couple of houses we had our eye on because they were heated with gas instead of electric. I thought gas heating was pretty rare for Texas but it turns out I was wrong. I mean. I have seen several gas stoves but I thought that was just a preference for cooking. PC and I were just concerned about the unknown. Neither of us are familiar with how gas heating works. I have learned a lot about it in the past week or so. We have decided not to pass on them anymore, which has considerably widened our search.
I am willing to bet I am the only Jewish girl on the block with a Christmas tree. Ha! Yeah that usually confuses people. I was raised recognizing both religions. My mom was raised Jewish and my dad wasn’t. As an adult I have had a hard time choosing just one. Why should I? I am very proud of my Jewish heritage. I feel like it would be disrespectful to my maternal family if I didn’t recognize that part of my “race” (for lack of better word). My mom and her siblings are the last generation still living. So I have my menorah up every year. But PC isn’t Jewish, so I also put a tree up every year. Our decor makes no sense to others. Our Christmakkah decor = Un-traditional.
I am still struggling with our family Christmas celebrations. At least the one for PC’s family. I don’t think they will ever understand how emotionally challenging the holidays are for me. I have to buy gifts for at least 13 kids! Hopefully I’m not leaving anyone out. And that’s just his side. Only two of those children belong to an adult that is older than PC and I. I am not saying all the children in the family were born to under age parents. I just mean, I am the oldest in my sibling group and PC is the middle child in his. Natural order would suggest we should already have children. At least before the younger adults in the family. Right?Again…Un-traditional.
Pc’s schedule is tough. He works nights. We are usually asleep while most people are awake and vise versa. He doesn’t get holidays off unless he can get them approved way in advance or if the holiday falls on his normal days off. Well let’s just say Wednesday and Thursday are not his normal days off. So that leaves me going to his family Christmas celebration all by my lonesome with a sac full of gifts for way too many children than I can handle being around all at once! And that is only IF I just happen to not be vomiting that day. Ugh…Un-traditional.
I guess it will just take time. That’s what people say anyways. For now, I will sit in my cozy little apartment and enjoy the company of Olaf. I will wrap these gifts with love in my heart. I will pray for GOD’s help along the way. Pray for the strength to smile when I feel so sick all the time. Pray for my family. For their health. Pray my dad makes a full recovery from this stroke. And pray PC and I can enjoy this holiday season no matter how untraditional it may be for us.
Much Love To All!