Ok universe, you and I need to have a little chat!

Once again my over-thinking, HSP brain is in overdrive. Just when I think I have something figured out, the universe steps in with it’s handy little fork that I swear was made just for my road.

So let me begin with an update on my latest treatment plan, the birth control pill. The bc pills were prescribed to hopefully alleviate some of my horrendous pms symptoms. I started on the lowest dose but they didn’t help at all, in fact they made my cramps and such worse! At my follow up the gyn decided maybe I needed a higher dose of hormone. It sounded like a great plan to me. Well let me fast forward through the nasty parts and just say that I ended up in the emergency room with an IV of fluids. I was treated for severe dehydration, a UTI that so far has shown ZERO symptoms and DRUG TOXICITY! Yup. I had a toxic reaction to the birth control pills. It was pretty much the worst 7 days of my life.

Today was the first day I felt almost like myself since my reaction to the pills. I am not 100% yet but compared to just 2 days ago I feel great. And today I decided I no longer want to be treated for my symptoms. I can’t afford to go to an RE anymore because just walking through the damn door is considered IF treatment and is NOT covered by my insurance. My only option was to pray that my gyn could help. We have tried to relieve my symptoms with several different treatment options and, to say the very least, nothing has helped. I am done! I am done listening to doctor’s. It is time they started listening to me. I am still confident in our decision to remain child free so give me all the information you got on a hysterectomy and sign me up!!!  I just can’t do it anymore. I.Am.Tired. What a weight off my shoulders. That decision plus the fact that I am finally feeling better made for a pretty good day. I took my mom to run her errands including her doctor’s appointment. Overall I was in a good mood.

Then on my way home I checked the mail.  I open up this large envelope and find out that PC’s work is adjusting their insurance for this year’s open enrollment and as I was reading through the material explaining the new plans I noticed a section titled “2015 UPGRADES”. The third upgrade on the list reads as follows: Infertility and bariatric treatments are now covered by all medical plans; pre-authorizations and limitations apply.<<<<<<<<

Excuse me??? Ok, I know it is hard to tell sometimes what IS a sign and what isn’t but really??? I know I have blogged about the rage I feel inside over this subject. How come a man can claim emotional distress and get Viagra covered by insurance or a woman claiming the same thing can get breast implants but I can’t even finish getting a diagnosis? My birth control pills are covered. So insurance will pay for me to prevent a pregnancy and in some states even TERMINATE one but my labs are not covered?! This subject has caused me so much stress in the past few years, I can’t even keep track of how much sleep I have lost over it. You would think this turn of events (I’m still calling it a fork in the road) would leave me ecstatic but it just pisses me off! Come on universe! Why would you wait until I have completely given up on figuring out what’s wrong with me to make figuring out what’s wrong with me possible? This has got to be a joke. What are you trying to say? Am I supposed to get a definite diagnosis? Is that HIS plan? It does make me wonder what kind of “infertility treatments” they are talking about. I mean, is it limited to all the blood work that HAS to be filed under IF or are we talking IVF kinda stuff? Now I am asking myself if these were the insurance terms a year ago would we still have chosen to remain child free? Would this coverage have changed my mind in any way? For now I will focus on the positives. I am very glad to be feeling better. PC and I are blessed to even have insurance in the first place. I feel guilty for allowing myself to get so  wrapped up in all the negative stuff that I forget to be thankful. I hope everyone had a fabulous Halloween!

~~Side Note~~ Spell check made me capitalize Viagra!!!! Ha!

Much Love To All.

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2 responses to “Ok universe, you and I need to have a little chat!

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