No ma’am, the school district is not a factor.

My highly sensitive self can’t sleep thanks to my phone conversation with our new real estate agent today. It is official. We are in the market to buy a house. Let the permanent state of panic begin! I can not stop thinking. My brain won’t shut off. This is a HUGE step, and the first HUGE step since our IF diagnosis.

I have kept my eye on the market for several years now. PC and I live in a fabulous, small, 1 bedroom apartment. We have stayed here for many reasons. Rent is so affordable, the maintenance crew saves us tons every year, and the location is great. We also have very fond memories built here because this is where PC and I got back together and eventually remarried. It is also where we learned about our IF and our future plans changed forever. Leaving this place will not be easy.

PC has a co-worker who had mentioned at one point that his wife was a real estate agent. So we called her up today to get the ball rolling. As she was taking down some info she started asking what we “wanted”. I gave her some basics, we want a one story, close to PC’s work…etc. Then she asked “Do you have a school district you want to be in?” My heart sunk. I was suddenly very aware of how different challenging this experience is going to be. 5 years ago when I started looking, I did have a district in mind, as well as a specific school district we did not want to live in. I quickly answered “No ma’am, the school district is not a factor.” I don’t remember her exact response but it was something along the lines of “Oh, that’s right, no kids. Ok, anything else that is extremely important to you guys?”  I’m sure I mentioned we don’t have kids in casual conversation at a few work functions when her and I chatted while our hubbies were occupied. I don’t recall if I gave any more info than that though. The phone call today and the question about school districts reminded me that this house buying experience is going to suck big time!!!! Just looking on my own has already been challenging, I can count on ONE hand how many of these houses for sale have NOT had a beautifully set up nursery.  Now that we have an agent, we will have to physically stand in these nurseries if we want to tour a house.

I am anticipating many emotional tantrums in my future. I have already tried to predict the other family planning related questions she might have and how I will answer them. I think I may have a small chat with her up front. Maybe if I “answer” a few of the necessary questions ahead of time (on my own terms) rather than waiting to be asked, it will be less uncomfortable for all of us. I have to believe that somehow, buying a house can still be a fantastic, exciting experience for us. If you happen to have any house buying advice (IF or non IF advice) please feel free to share! I’m shakin’ in my boots over here!

Much Love To All!

7 responses to “No ma’am, the school district is not a factor.

  1. I pray that this experience will not constantly bring up painful thoughts!! That God would only direct you all to houses that don’t have nurseries. And that you will come upon sensitive real estate agents – maybe even HSP – who don’t automatically ask those questions.
    When I go to church, and the usher says , “Just one?” I want to (and do) cry.
    God bless you on this house hunt!

    • Thank you so much for the prayers! I know it’s my own fears creating this anxiety but knowing doesn’t stop it. You brought tears to my eyes…”Just One?” That must be heartbreaking! I pray that God gives you the strength to smile when the usher asks you that from now on! Xoxo

  2. We just can’t seem to stop making each other cry, can we?! 🙂 thank you so much for your prayers. Fortunately the church I now belong to is smaller than most usher committee at big churches. Haha! But there are still ways in which my singleness is glaring. I hope you will keep everyone updated on your house search!!

  3. That’s tough. We live in such a family-centric culture that I’m sure there are triggers lurking unexpectedly around too many corners. But this is such an exciting step, and I wish you well!!

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