This up-coming holiday should be called Mothering day. And from now on that is what I shall call it. Or maybe we should just add this to the list of holidays. I have ran across a few other blogs that called it “Other’s Day”. Very clever. Clearly I lack the ability to be that clever. Anyhoo…What does Mothering Day mean? You can replace the following with your own personal description/experiences. The meaning is yours to define. This is what it means to me…
~To those who have mothered with your heart not your arms because that’s all you could do. For a day or a month or for years.
~ To those of us who have so much motherly love and excitement saved up over the years for our potential/future child, we struggle to keep it contained.
~ To those of us who have loved/cared for a child with all of our hearts, regardless of their legal or biological relation to us. We have been through the 2am feedings, diaper changes, baby showers, birthday parties, and so much more, all for a child we did not bear or may not even be related to.
~ To those of us who have ever had to euthanize a pet. Even worse, 2 pets AFTER your IF diagnosis. Did I love my fur babies less before my IF? Of course not. I think the loss was harder though.
~ To those of us who have worked at the local emergency shelter. Who spent hours upon hours tending to the infant who arrived last week with fevers, colic, poor feeding, vomiting, diarrhea and seizures brought on by her Meth withdraws. Vowing you will never forget these experiences when you become a parent, only to realize you never will. You didn’t have to go through that with her but you did. It was not your responsibility but that child’s needs came before all else.
~ To the child care worker who stayed after closing time because one dad arrived late, drunk and on a motorcycle to pick up his 1 1/5 year old daughter, so you had to wait for the police. Or how about when a new person comes to pick up one of your 3 year old students and she freezes in fear as soon as she sees him? She was scared and I believed her! As long as she had that look in her eyes, he would have to go through me first! He chose not to go through me. Her mom’s stalker ex boyfriend went to jail that day and my student went home safe.
~ To those who have actually shaved our heads because that’s what your 4 year old niece had to do before the docs took that damn tumor out of her brain. Helped change her dressings after surgery and held her when she was hurting. You best believe we rocked this look and she is a healthy 10 year old today!
~ To those of us who have sat in a room full of immediate family and prayed as your 12 month old niece took her last breath. Watching her mother’s heart shatter into pieces, meanwhile you feel the need to be the strong one. Keep it together, comfort the family. Wishing with all your might that she could wake from the coma she has lived in every day of her short life. Knowing you would trade places with this beautiful baby girl in a heartbeat if it meant she could open her eyes for the first time ever and smile at her mom.
~ To those of us who have had to explain to a 2 year old why his mommy is now in heaven. How do you explain a tragic car accident to a toddler? When he truly believes she is at your house because ya’ll were best friends. How do you help him understand? With all of the motherly comfort you can muster up every day in class because you are his teacher and he looks up to you! That’s how!
~ To those of us who have been barfed on by a child who was suffering from RSV. Or the less serious (but motherly love required) sneezes, coughs and boo boos we clean and comfort for the little ones in our lives.
~ To those of us who have/have had a loved one dependant on you. The things you sacrifice for this person. Your days off, your energy (physical and mental), your money. You don’t mind at all because you love them. You would rather do it yourself for as long as you are able than leave your loved one in someone else’s hands.
~ To those of us who have cared for a sibling in ways only their parents should have. These siblings were young. They won’t remember all you have done for them. And if they are still young/immature, they will only remember the times you couldn’t help. You didn’t do any of those things for the credit though. You did them out of love. Out of “whatever” instinct kicked in at the time so they would survive! Literally! When you were frightened for your life and you protected them, not yourself.
That is what a mother’s love is like. So technically we may not be mothers yet but many of us have already mothered! We have been on an emotional rollercoaster only “actual” mothers get credit for. So today/this weekend, I give you the credit you deserve!! Thank you, Congrats and HAPPY MOTHERING DAY!
Side note: An hour ago this blog had a totally different point. Still Mother’s day related but with much more humor. I had the meme picked out and everything. I guess in this midst of writing that blog my mood changed and I focused on this point instead. And I know it is early but I have “Mothering Day” plans for myself this weekend and may not have time to blog. 🙂 And as always…
Much Love to all…