Hear me roar!

Here is my thought for the night…

chaos

When my heart finally roars I hope it is loud enough to be heard across the country! Yes the chaos is disturbing to say the least but somehow, somewhere, sometime we will come out of it stronger. Maybe not in all aspects of our lives but stronger nonetheless…And I for one will take any amount of strength I can get.

It’s 4 o’clock am and I am nowhere near tired. I’m yawning but we all know that means nothing when it comes to insomnia.  So here I am blogging. I promised an update anyways so that’s what I will do.

Update:    Dr. appt went as expected. He was very confused  why the meds weren’t helping me. I expressed my concerns regarding the connection between my current symptoms and my infertility. He didn’t have a response to that. His only reaction after jotting down many unknown lines, was to put me back on the combination of meds I was on a few years ago. Ya know, the ones that didn’t work either. I accepted right there in his office, that he did not see a connection and was still convinced I needed to be medicated for bipolar. I smiled, checked out, and phoned my new primary care doc as soon as I got to my car. I made an appt with her for March 3rd. I hope to get another plan together then.

I have gone thru so many doctors in these past 2 years. Is there something going on here I just can’t see? Am I giving up on these doctors for no reason at all? I just don’t feel like I have found the right one for me. Is this selfish? What happened to the good ol days when you had one doctor. Yes just one. Sure you were still sent to a specialist when needed. But the results were sent to this one dr and you went back to THAT ONE to go over the results. I need a ring leader! That’s what I need, a ring leader. Wishful thinking I suppose. Still waiting for the magnificent part but I do not doubt it is on it’s way.

Much Love.

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