Do you want the good or bad first?

Let’s start with the bad. Rough week. My moods have been all over the place and today was particularly stressful. I had spotted for a couple of days before I actually started. No cramps, just spots. I haven’t done that in a while. This made me nervous enough to test. Due to my bi-polar meds I have no choice but to test every time there is a change in my body. I can’t afford to be on this bi-polar medication while pregnant. The risk is too high and I am high risk already. As luck would have it, very shortly after my expected negative result, I started. I still managed to go to my check up with the pcp today. More frustrating news to add to this mood. My cholesterol is through the roof. Vitamin D is very low. Not only do the results make me feel bad but PC’s results actually improved since our last blood work. What?? I do the cooking! We eat the same things usually except he eats MORE. Even tho he has a job, he has a desk job, so not much more exercise than me. After our last appt I even made several changes to our diet. Feels like just more health issues I can;t figure out how to fix. I’m fighting a battle with no armor or weapons of my own. I was ready to crawl into bed and after grabbing our prescriptions, that was the plan. While at the drugstore I noticed a mother pushing a stroller with an infant in it. Probably 4 months old or so. She also had 2 older boys, they looked 4 and 5 years old. She sat the older boys in an isle near the pharmacy and roamed the store with her stroller. The boys pulled several toys off the shelf and played with them as they sat in the middle of the wrapping paper isle. I didn’t pay much attention at first, I thought she was just around a corner I couldn’t see. As PC and I were leaving the pharmacy section I realized she was nowhere to be seen and the boys had made their way to the front door of the store. Still no mom in sight. The doors opened as PC and I approached and one of the boys walked right out the door with us!!!! Excuse me? He was laughing and hiding from the other boy. Clueless to how dangerous this was.(Of course he was clueless he was like 4 years old!!) Not only was he walking into a parking lot alone but the store is located right off a main road. It would have only taken him seconds to reach a 4 lane road during rush hour traffic. I could feel the rage building up in my body. I sighed, turned to the little boy with my hand on his shoulder and said “Hold on buddy, I need you to head back in there and find your mom. Ok?” He smiled and ran back in with no objection. I turned back around and fought the tears all the way to the car.  I know children can wander off even when they are supervised well. My niece used to find it amusing to crawl into the round clothing racks with the intentions of jumping out to scare me. I get that. HOWEVER…. The gift bag isle is not considered supervision and it is sad that some people don’t know that!! Ok Ok, on to the “good” part.

pcos

 

Lately I have occupied myself with these 2 diaries I found. Years ago when my nana passed away, I found these diaries with her book collection. They belong to a man I have never heard of and so far non of my relatives recognize the name either. The contents of these diaries are so interesting I can’t put them down. They are the accounts of a navy man out at sea in the 1920’s!! 1923 thru 1925 to be exact. There are time gaps throughout and his cursive handwriting is not always legible but so interesting. He is very detailed in his entries. He talks about the country he is in, the weather, his friends, waiting on letters from the “home folk” and more. I have absolutely loved reading these. My mission is to maybe find his family and return the books to them. I’m sure they would enjoy reading so many of his thoughts even more than I have. I have actually researched many of the details he writes about. Names of ships, ports…etc. he mentions a lodge he stayed at before he went out to see. he said it was in Norfolk Nebraska. never heard of that place. I thought he made some sort of typo. I know personally a naval base/area in Norfolk Virginia but Nebraska?? Turns out there is and the lodge he mentioned is still there and up and running too. So cool! It’s like getting lost in a fictional book and although I know it’s a true story, I still get lost in the moment. Like I am actually there on the deck waiting for the President Wilson to arrive with the letters from home. I relate to his changes in mood. Every day he feels differently about where he is, not just in life but literally where he is on the map. So, the positive I take from today is… I’m not on a ship in the middle of the Philippines suffering from these hot flashes in this man’s Air conditioner “free” room getting paid less than $7 per diem!!!

Much love to you all!

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